"Parental Guilt"

   I have been blessed with the opportunity of being around mothers to young children. I am also blessed to be a mamipikin of 4 and counting. Now apart from weight loss and lack of "personal time" the next big issue we always discuss is "parental guilt". Parental guilt is worse with first time mothers. It sets in that moment when you have to leave your infant for the first time to take a break, go to work, school, or an afternoon out for some down time. Do not fret! You have been building relationships all your life for moments like this when you need to leave your infant with a responsible adult. Some one you trust. You are not doing anything wrong.

  I don't have a long drawn out post on parental guilt because you don't need to feel guilty for taking a break, going to school  and or going to work in order to provide for your family, its that simple. As long as you are setting that time aside  to spend with your family when you can, you need not worry. You are doing what you need to do in order to take care of your family. I used to feel horrible for leaving my kids for a couple of hours. It was a real problem. I would worry about the nanny, or family member left with the responsibility for a couple of hours. The truth is that we cannot do it on our own. It truly takes a village. The Job is a necessity and so is the break or little time off from home.

    Some parents go as far as "over compensating" because they are not as available as they will love to be, they end up buying their kids out. Do not buy your children out. Do not get in the habit of teaching your children that material things can solve all of lives problems. Talk to your children once they can understand. Explain to them why you have to work or take a breather. Tell them about what it takes to be an adult and all the responsibilities you have as an adult.

    You always have to be the parent, and that involves making decisions that may be difficult for the children and even others to understand. At the end of the day, you want whats  best for you and your family and thats what truly matters.

  Let go of parental guilt. You are allowed to make a living for your family. You are also allowed to take a breather when needed. Like I said earlier, you are doing what you need to do in order to take care of your family, there should be no guilt involved.

Kisses.

Don't drown in the social media pool of foolishness

   
        Its summer vacation at my home "big compound" (as commonly called). Please excuse me if you see any of these phrases in this post "stop it", "close the fridge", "turn down the volume" or "leave the baby alone". I know I cant be the only one who says this ALL DAY. Any how I love my children and wont have it anyother way, theres nothing I enjoy better than being a mother.

I love a big family. (This is from my sisters graduation two years ago)

       I see so much foolishness on social media, I don't know who to get pissed at? Is it the people posting the madness or the ones liking and commenting on any madness. Be true to yourself, how were you before the LIKE button? the issue here is that our generation gets their self confidence from social media popularity, or should I say social media acknowledgment, so we have forgotten how to live without putting on a show for our social media audience. We are raising children in this shallow world, do not ignore talking to your loved ones about how important it is for your inside to be better than your outside, how important it is to do good without a siren for recognition. As a mother instilling great self confidence in my children is very important. Do not let the social media view of life swallow you and your loved ones.

       We can enjoy all the benefits of social media networking, meeting old friends, and more without  loosing all integrity and common sense in the process.
May God heal us.

    Let no mamipikin live based on social media recognition. We are better than putting up a show for a couple of LIKES. Always read and re-read before you hit the post button.

Kisses
#nomamipikinleftbehind

Your choices...

   

 As a mother of 4 children, aunty, Godmother, wife, sister, daughter and more, I chose to work 5 days a week from home and run a fast pace, fast growing, event planning company on the weekends. This works for my family. Other mothers work out of the home and that works best for their families. Basically every family does what is best for them. There is no perfect way. No way, not at all, just what works best!

     Now with that being said I am running into some very insensitive people and I'm sure you my fellow mamipikins are too. People who assume that they have a blueprint for a perfect mother. Do not apologize for the decisions you make in regards to the well being of your family. Do not get in the habit of explaining "what" and "why" to anyone. Keep your responses short and direct to the point. Learn to spend your time and energy wisely!  No one can possibly love your child and or children more than you. Don't let people run your homes. Don't fall under the pressure of "others".

     Whatever you choose to do or give as a mom is usually your best. Stand behind your own choices. Your family should be your number one priority.

Let nomamipikin live for anyone else. Your choices are "YOUR" choices.

Kisses ...