Sunday, January 7, 2018

Don't lose your MIND...

   Happy New year Mamipikins!
   I definitely owe you all an apology for being MIA. After writing and publishing my first book; Mamipikin Talks/ A Safe Space To Be You, I have been on the go nonstop. Its been one event to the other and then we are in 2018. This is a great time to be alive. A time where you have the ability to think and make decisions for yourself. Don't take this time for granted.

   I wanted to start the year off  by opening up a discussion on sanity. There is a trend in our community asking women to meet certain needs or risk losing spouses, boyfriends, housemates, partners (whatever your situation is) and this has kept me up for a while so I thought I will share on here so we start this year strong.

   Just so you know I am a christian married mother of four so please don't come at me with bible verses of submission because this conversation is certainly not about submission. I am all for submission according to the bible by women to their husbands. And because I know we have male readers, men please do well to love your spouse's, for the bible says so as well. OK, back to the topic at hand. Today’s society is asking that we do hoops, back flips, splits and a lot more so that our spouses are not promiscuous. We go as far as blaming women for not being able to stay on task with the demands at all times as the reason for promiscuity. No one mentions the most important aspect in a relationship which is sanity and inner peace. You want to be very sane. Don't lose your sanity over any relationship. You want to do all these lovely things cook, clean, be a lady in the streets and a freak in the bed, wear matching lingerie, travel the world all of it but at the end of the day make sure YOU are present and not just doing this to keep up with today's idea of a relationship. When you have lost your mind you are no good to your family, your relationship, your career, and most importantly yourself. You want to fall in love not fall for love. If anything drives you insane it's not worth it. You don't understand how bad it is until you are completely wiped out. Then you result to hate, jealousy, gossip, depression and worst cases suicide. Yes people die for Love and relationships. It's a fact.
     You want to enjoy your relationship, first of all love yourself and your mind. Be in love with you. Be sooo in love with yourself that you can remain PRESENT in the relationship and your spouse cannot help but fall in love with you over and over again. Make sure you don't give up your dreams for love. You need to keep your mind sane by doing the things you love. These things should be the things that complete you as a person.

  Yes, mind blowing sex, great food, vacations, and all these are great then what? Can you have sex forever? How much food can you eat?  Both men and women need peace and sanity at home and in their lives. You want Christ to give you inner peace that keeps you sane. You want to be a sane human. No man wants an insane woman and vice versa. At the end of the day you need YOU.

  At the end of the day a relationship should complete you because you are bringing your best to the table and so are they. If you constantly feel depleted in your relationships you need to reevaluate and go back to the drawing board. Of course no relationship is perfect. No one should expect complete fulfillment from anyone else unless our Lord Jesus Christ. You wont meet any saints on earth, so as the year begins look around you. Are your relationships, friendships, partnerships etc. time wasters or are do they contribute to your greater purpose or are you loosing your mind daily.
And just so you know relationship is defined as the way in which two or more concepts, objects, or people are connected, or the state of being connected. So Please check your relationships!

Be selfish and Love you first.
Be selfish and create a workable schedule that adds you to the list.
Be selfish and buy yourself that gift that you are expecting from a relationship or spouse.
Be selfish and have a hobby that keeps you sane.
Be selfish and have your own list, haha. Bring your own list of demands on the table.
Be selfish and start this year with the intention of keeping your sanity!
Be selfish and read a self help book.
Be selfish and insist on being a woman that has inner peace.
Be selfish and insist on being the sane one in all your relationships.

You need to be present to chase your wildest dreams. You need to be present in order to Love anyone else. You need to be present to be a great mother, wife, aunt, neighbor and human.
Don't lose your mind in 2018.

Get your copy today:
 Mamipikin Talks/ A Safe Space To Be You
Amazon eBook; )

Cheers Kisses,

Thursday, August 10, 2017

The DEGREE inside of YOU

The degree inside of  YOU.

   Oh how I have missed you all. Please forgive me. Its been one of the busiest summers for me in many years. I know that's a lame excuse, and will try to do better. I have been writing though, because I write to stay sane. I write my thoughts, my frustrations, my joy, and a lot more. I have been writing to my self.

    So as I resume to sharing, I will like to talk about something that has been on my mind. "The DEGREE inside of you". I know my scholars and very highly educated and over achiever Mamipikins are like "Yes!!!" hahahaha. I am sorry to tell you that this degree does not come from a formal class room. This degree comes from inside of YOU! 

    I usually share with everyone I meet that I never finished college as its not in line with what I am called to do in this season of my life. Now don't screen shot this and tell the world that I am encouraging women to drop out of school. Please screen shot this as a reminder that there is no formal classroom that can teach you about walking in your purpose. You have an inborn degree or several, in some cases that only need your activation. This activation rarely comes from a college campus. All I am saying is that in order to succeed you MUST ACTIVATE the DEGREE inside of YOU! Activation starts with believing in yourself enough that you don't have space in your head and heart for low self esteem, doubt, malice, hate, gossip, and the need for outside validation. 

   You don't need any formal training to walk in the gift that the Lord blessed you with. It comes naturally. You only need activation. Its like having a cell phone, unless you activate it it's just a phone. The only activating agent is ACTION. What are you doing with whats inside of you?  A lot of our poor decisions are based on the simple fact that we don't trust our inborn degrees. Or we let them go dormant. Our children make the same mistakes because we don't tell them how dynamic they are. We raise our children with the same pressures we were raised with. At a young age our children are already in constant fear of what people will think about them. Some of us have taken on the role of satisfying the outside by all means possible. We are in a time where walking your purpose is deemed a taboo and being a side chick, or home wrecker is glorified because society says so. A time where choosing to be steadfast in your purpose is considered a taboo trend, but its OK to forward child pornography and more. A time where siblings are taught hate by parents based on the parents reaction to their children's "success". All this because the latter seems acceptable to society and we have been conditioned to think that what society thinks about us is more important than what we think about our selves. Are we really happy with what society deems important? what does it do to our moral compass? Is what society expects out of you a reflection of your internal degree or gifting? 

    A snippet of one of the highlights of my very busy summer. Teaching/sharing on weddings, family, marriage and more at the AEPDS BRIDAL ACADEMY ( 

   Your gift is enough. Your God given ability to function and bring change is enough. Nobody should tell you that success only comes with a lengthy blueprint and hosts of institutional degrees. Your blueprint and GPS is in Christ and he lives within you. Your in born gift will always bring about the completion you need to function properly. The activation and honoring of this gift will change your life for the best. Take a chance and follow that which is inside of you. Life is your only classroom. 

With one of the best teams I have ever worked with. Destination wedding in Montego Bay, Jamaica


(Our next couple of entries will be on recognizing the degrees set inside of you and more. Don't forget to subscribe to stay connected.) 

Kisses :)

Monday, June 26, 2017

"Yaah Yefon"

"Yaah YEFON "
     So its 3:00am and I cannot possible explain the weekend I had. However one thing sent me to this blog at this hour. Sometime ago I got invited by His Royal Majesty Fon Nganjo of Njirong village. Well if you have been following the blog you will gather that I was born in Cameroon and I absolutely respect and adore my culture. When I got this invitation I was a nervous wreck and had a million questions on what the Fon needed to discuss with my husband and I. If you are not familiar with our culture as Cameroonians you might not get the big deal. Our Fons are revered. They are our traditional rulers. You don't walk into the palace and visit the Fon. You request his audience in so many steps through his council. What could I have done to be summoned to meet with the traditional leaders of our Land in the USA? The question kept me up and wondering. My mother who can usually whip up answers for my many concerns was not too sure either. All she advised was to make sure we came in with our heads covered up as we could not be in audience with the Fon with our heads not covered up, meaning I needed scarf or head tie and my husband needed a hat.
    Sunday finally came and I had to face the reality of being summoned by a great ruler of my people. We arrived to the Palace and we were welcomed by HRM Fon Nganjo's wife who is "Ma Wintoh" (mother/wife of the palace). She had a feast laid out. We ate and sat down, waiting to be called in.
Dressed in our Sundays best. Toghu (Atoghu print specially hand made in Cameroon for events of this magnitude)

    The Hour finally came and I was called in. After a couple of welcomes and more, the women in the room took me into a separate room with a new set of clothes set up and ready for me to change into. How did they get my size is all I could think of. I mean everything was my exact size. (Wondering how I got photos? Well everyone around me knows I document everything. And my sister Anyi who is Godmother to my number 3 is behind this phone camera in oohhhs and ahhhhs capturing all of this. I am truly grateful that we had a conversation about this and she showed up to support me.)

All dressed up and ready to go.

His Royal Majesty Fon Nganjo of Njirong village addresses the reason of the summon and traditional rites follow.


In this audience was; 
HRM FON of Nganjo of Njirong village.
HRM FON of  NKAR, HRM FON of Babungo, HRM FON OF BAMUKUMBIT, MBE TAZI. Members of the USNWFC, family and friends.

Thankful for you wonderful women who went out of your way to make it to the Palace to support me. (From Left to right -Anyi, Aunty Rosemary aka aunty Mermaid, Yefon  and Star) 

And this is how my weekend ended. I am completely overwhelmed. You have no idea how much of an out of body experience this was to me. I love to serve and contrary to what most people who don't know me on a personal level think, I absolutely hate being the center of  attention. 

   If you look at the photos and videos I am completely overwhelmed. I never saw this coming, I have always served with love and with my whole heart. I am very thankful to the people of Njirong and the world at large for even considering that I serve in any capacity. My everyday dream is to be of service to the world especially its women. My everyday desire is to encourage,empower and support the women in my community and beyond  My goal is to ensure that every woman  I get a chance to meet personally or through my writing  is impacted positively and encouraged to walk in their purpose. As a mother of four incredibly diverse children,several Godchildren and a huge external family  I  speak from a point of experience, empathy, failure, success, love and determination. My goal is to promote a culture where women feel limitless while striving to become the best version of themselves. Thank you to the people of Njirong, you all absolutely blew my mind. May God give me the grace, wisdom, love, kindness, and dedication I need to serve you all. 

I share this experience with you because you all are a part of this journey. #Nomamipikinleftbehind. 

Yours truly, 
" Yaah Yefon of  Njirong "


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Tuesday, May 23, 2017


    Hello there fam! Yesterday I was going to share this post however, I am in recovery from a beautiful busy weekend. I got to enjoy brunch with a room full of royalty on Sunday in honor of mothers day.

      The entire graduation and mothers day month I get to interact with family, friends, clients, ask questions, get emails, and more. Its been on my mind for years to share about the importance of loving all your children EQUALLY. And the importance of loving your family members equally or at least working at it.

      On mothers day, I spend a lot of time reading, observing, and asking questions because its in my nature to observe my surroundings. I listen to women make what i choose to call absurd judgments on each other. I even read somewhere on social media that as a mother if you didn't get a gift and bought your own gift, you are pathetic. Really boo? Are you serious right now? Pathetic for loving my self? Some women even go as far as talking down their friends and sisters who are not mothers yet with some story of an age range and more. Anyhow in all this I have come to find the month of May to be very interesting. Did I mention that some people are actually unable to call their mothers on "mothers day" because mommy is in heaven? And the whole mothers day charade just overwhelms them? Yep! And then we have the beautiful graduation celebrations. And thanks to social media we get to celebrate with each other in a way that we have not been able to for many years. People from far and near can watch you live, you can tweet, snap chat, all of that. Yes May is an emotionally charged month.

  Some of us don't understand that our children should be loved equally and celebrated as often as we can. (Celebration does not translate to a sometimes unnecessary party). Love all your children equally. And loving your child means being able to discipline them when its called for. Not enabling bad behavior as compensation for your bad parenting. Not enabling an addiction, laziness, and mediocrity because its easier. Don't love them according to your idea of achievement and or success! Celebrate the little things so that they will aim for greater. Your children are waiting to hear you applaud their achievements  without any judgments. You are not allowed to love your physician child more than the musician. It is not OK. You are not allowed to celebrate those with grand kids more than those who don't have any kids. And it gets deeper. You love the married kids more than the single parent. We cannot continue to live in a community where parents choose to discriminate amongst their kids, and in so doing bringing division amongst their children. Who said that it was OK to love your children only when you feel like they are "successful" and I insist that success is relative. Its your responsibility to love your children equally. You openly celebrate the children that are "publicly successful". And yes public success is a topic for another day.

  In this month of May, lets choose to love on purpose. Love and respect women enough to not suggest that they must have children at a certain age. Leave their wombs alone.  Love all your children equally. Love yourself enough to not let these obvious prejudices hold you back from living life like its golden. Love all your siblings equally regardless of their financial statements. 

Love each other on purpose. 

No Mami Pikin Left Behind!

Sunday, May 14, 2017

Happy Mothers day. Choose YOU!

   And its mothers day. Happy mothers day to the most consistent cape less superheroes. Society better not get too excited about giving us one calendar holiday. We would take it, however if you have been around a mother, are a mother, or know a mother you will agree that  there is not a single holiday that is more important than a holiday that celebrates mothers.

  This mothers day I want you to take an oath of "self Love".
I want you to love yourself as much as you love the responsibilities that come with the  crown of motherhood. Love yourself enough to take care of "YOU" mentally, physically, emotionally, spiritually and psychologically. Put you first. Get out of the habit of expecting anyone else to. Do not give anyone else the power of your sanity. 

     This mothers day I want you to take an oath of "Commitment to yourself". Your relationship with yourself is the most important one you’ve got. Make a commitment to take care of yourself, as you would you do everyone else. This mothers day my prayer is that you have a conversation with your self. That we will use the same radar we use to evaluate others on ourselves. This mothers day take your investigations on the inside. Are you living happily? Are there things you can do differently in order to improve your quality of life? Your quality of life matters!

    This mothers day don't wait for anyone else to buy you flowers. If you love flowers buy yourself some flowers. If you enjoy movies, take your self to the movies and so on and so forth. Take back your power this mothers day. Commit to giving your self those things that you absolutely desire. Give  yourself your time, your energy,  and most especially your love. Your children and society needs a mother that loves herself so much there is no room for self sabotage.

  What you commit to today creates your future.  The words you speak, the thoughts you think, the people you commit to. Choose wisely. Let today be a new day. Take an oath to Love you unconditionally.

  Happy Mothers day to my favorite people in the world.  


If you are a mother in the DMV register and join us for brunch honoring mothers next Sunday.


Thursday, March 23, 2017

Lets talk "Commitment"

When we talk commitment everyone immediately thinks "relationships".  Little do we know that commitment is a core value in our everyday dealings.

     As women, we pride ourselves on taking care of others.  We commit ourselves to our partners, our children, our families, our best friends, our colleagues, our extended families, our church, our prayer groups, our community, our businesses, and a whole lot more. We are professionals at making sure everyone and everything around us SEEMS perfect. This got me thinking. What’s the difference between interest and commitment? Interest is reactive and Commitment is proactive. When you’re interested in doing something, you do it only when circumstances permit. When you are committed to something, you accept zero excuses, only results. For example "Interest reads about Mamipikintalks and agrees with it,  commitment registers to attend and follows up even after the event."( hahaha you know I had to use mamipikintalks.) "Interest works an hour a day on your business; commitment works whenever time permits".

     So lets talk relationship commitment  and get it out of the way. I know everyone would like to discuss commitment or the lack there of. Commitment is a very essential part of our relationships. Without commitment there will be chaos. A relationship can be deemed nonexistent without commitment. You must both commit for any relationship to be functional. Commitment in your relationships are your responsibility. YOU are responsible for your behavior in every relationship. In our community today some people think that they should be committed to everything and everyone except their relationships. Don't get into a relationship if you are not ready to be proactive. Commitment is proactive. And don't make the mistake of blaming yourself for the lack of commitment from your partners,spouses,friends and more. YOU are only responsible for YOUR behavior and commitment.

      There is such a thing as “Commitment ABUSE”
Sometimes we are committed to keeping everyone else's dream except ours. We are in relationships, friendships, jobs, careers, bands, etc and we commit to making sure everyone associated is happy except US. We commit to being abused mentally, emotionally, physically and verbally. We get sooo committed that abuse becomes the norm. Once you are committed to anything that does not bring you fulfillment, or adds value and meaning to your life, you are wasting valuable time and hurting your LEGACY. And  I don't mean the pain you experience in a gym, or during labor, I mean the pain of abuse. The pain that strips you of joy, love, happiness, a sound mind, etc.“Commitment abuse” happens to the best of us. We commit to a lot of things and our commitment is taken advantage of. Your skill, time, craft, and even LOVE can be abused. You do not need to commit to the very things that strip you of your SANITY!

Commitment to yourself!
   Your relationship with yourself is the most important one you’ve got.
 Being present  in your life is everything, being present is essential. So we often want others to commit to us but we cannot commit to OURSELVES? How do we expect anyone to commit to someone that is not there? We cannot carry any task to the end. We are side liners in our own lives. We look at our lives on the sideline. We refuse to commit to anything that brings us growth. Make a commitment to take care of yourself, as you would you do everyone else. By immersing yourself in the little things that bring you JOY.  Keeping your word is critical to restoring your sanity and creating a meaning driven life. Yes, "keeping your word to yourself" honoring what you commit to and keeping your own promises. Ask yourself the very important questions you ask everyone else. Questions like; How can I care for myself today? Am I experiencing commitment abuse? Do I need a vacation, interaction, exercise, comforting? Am I following my  purpose? Remember that what you commit to today, the thoughts you think, the people you commit to, the books you read, shows you watch, your friendships, all these shape your future.

Short Clip from Mamipikintalks event on commitment. 

Mark 9:23 says, “Everything is possible for the person who has faith” (GNT).

Let No Mamipikin Be Left Behind!!!!!

Thursday, March 16, 2017

And we crowned her QUEEN


     I have always wondered why we had to wait for a beauty pageant to crown women Queens. As we were planning and putting together details for MamipikintalksIII, the lord laid it in my heart to crown one of our beautiful attendees Queen. And this time she didn't need a beauty contest, judges, pressure on physical appearance, or any special talents. We started the tradition and the dream is to empower, uplift, encourage, and inspire women to believe in themselves enough to follow their dreams. It was a fair process and after a draw Ms. Diane Daiga was named Queen. It was a beautiful moment. 
She was named "Miss Mamipikintalks".



      A woman who loves herself has freed her mind from the burden of hoping, wanting and even needing anyone else to accept all of her.