Its 5 am and I have been up all night because my 8 year old has a stomach bug. That's a story for another post.
Anyhow that brings me to a sequel of sorts on child bearing and more... http://nomamipikinleftbehind.blogspot.com/2015/04/whos-counting.html?m=1 (Read here).
Yesterday I shared on my personal Facebook page ( for those who follow me) that I had gone through 5 pregnancies and had 4 live births. And a lot of things or emotions came up because it took me back to my miscarriage. I had a miscarriage some 5/6 years ago. I remember how devastated I was and very heart broken. I also recount how everyone ( well mostly the adult women around me) insisted that I keep the miscarriage a secret. I remember hearing them say things like "oh don't worry, it was not a real baby yet". And a whole lot more that I would rather forget. In all the harassment, I was blessed with a solid set of sisters/friends thankfully, who supported me and stayed on me with so much love to make sure I went through the loss with their support.
A miscarriage is very devastating. It feels like a part you leaves when the baby doesn't make it to term.You go through so many emotions. Its that pain that only God can truly heal. A lot of women go through miscarriages and cannot heal completely because our culture doesn't promote expressing your pain in regards to a miscarriage. You have women who are going through a whole lot of pain, struggling to conceive and cannot share on the struggle of their journey because our society harasses women about their wombs, its contents and use. You are not given the opportunity to share about the pain of a miscarriage and therefore complete restoration and healing never really takes place. For Gods sake a miscarriage is not a taboo. A miscarriage is a painful loss of a child. You can refuse to call it that, but to that mother that's exactly what it is.
Your job as a sister, mother, friend, spouse, etc is to be a shoulder to lean on. Encourage the woman in need to seek professional help if necessary because sometimes the trauma requires more than a couple of conversations with your best friends. And if you go through a miscarriage please do not live in fear, and do not loose hope. Our God is gracious and would never forsake you. Take the time to heal and do not do it on anyone else's timing. If you can, seek help from miscarriage help groups. You are welcome to share as you please. You are not alone and should NOT DIE IN SILENCE.
To you who has gone through a miscarriage or several miscarriages. I stand on behalf of all the people who have hurt you, disappointed you, questioned your WOMB, and judged you by your circumstances. I stand to say SORRY. I apologize for the hurt, I also apologize and hope that you can forgive not only those who did not support you during this difficult time, but you can forgive yourself and live again with hope that the Lord has not forgotten you.
A lot of women make the conscious choice not to have any children and it should be respected. I also ask we practice to stay out of each others wombs. You don't question my choices on child bearing and I promise not to question your decision not to bear children. You don't question any one's timing on when to bear children and you don't play WOMB police.
Cheers to a beautiful holiday. Love a woman today, regardless of their WOMB choice.
Nomamipikinleftbehind
