I would wait to include all this in a book, but then I believe there is some mother
out here that needs this post. To those who might not know, I am a mother of 4 wonderful children. All 4 delivered full term vaginally. When I had my first child everything was a complete shock, from breastfeeding, to bath time, to my countless attempts at bottle-feeding. Now I am one of the most persistent people you will ever meet. I had "my" expectations from pregnancy all the way to labor and beyond. My oldest child completely refused a bottle, I only survived because of the wonderful family God blessed us with. We bought every-bottle in the market and finally gave up. I breastfed her for 14months. Now that was my personal choice.(Breastfeeding requires patience and a ton of dedication. Don't loose your mind if you don't get it right the first time, there is no award to be won, no badges and or medals.)The transition from newborn to about 2 months was the toughest time in my life.
Bringing a newborn baby home is a very demanding task, even though its very special it can be a litttle nerve wrecking for most people. We should not ignore discussing what is important at our babyshowers, and or intimate mommy "hang outs". Talk about complete surprise when you come home and nothing is like the mommy blogs full of cute babies describes it. No one tells you about the reality of post partum blues, or how unbelievably sore you will be immediately your milk comes in,(breast milk of course), no one tells you that "baby latching" is an entire Grad-school program cramped up in a day and can be one of the most frustrating things you ever experience, no one prepares the new moms for the constant explaining that needs to be done (by those who choose to, personally I did not have the time) to your non-mom friends about why you are so tired, or unavailable to chat for hours on the phone, or that your outings will be timed. All these are not to scare our new "mamipikins" but to prepare them for a completely new and very deserving stage in life. Instead of focusing on how quick one must fix the outside; weight, skin, waist size and more postpartum, talk about the reality of bringing home a new baby to your expectant mothers, talk about sex drive and or the lack there of, encourage each other to accept the process of gradual weight loss, and staying positive reminding them that just like pregnancy it does not last forever.
Bringing a newborn baby home is a very demanding task, even though its very special it can be a litttle nerve wrecking for most people. We should not ignore discussing what is important at our babyshowers, and or intimate mommy "hang outs". Talk about complete surprise when you come home and nothing is like the mommy blogs full of cute babies describes it. No one tells you about the reality of post partum blues, or how unbelievably sore you will be immediately your milk comes in,(breast milk of course), no one tells you that "baby latching" is an entire Grad-school program cramped up in a day and can be one of the most frustrating things you ever experience, no one prepares the new moms for the constant explaining that needs to be done (by those who choose to, personally I did not have the time) to your non-mom friends about why you are so tired, or unavailable to chat for hours on the phone, or that your outings will be timed. All these are not to scare our new "mamipikins" but to prepare them for a completely new and very deserving stage in life. Instead of focusing on how quick one must fix the outside; weight, skin, waist size and more postpartum, talk about the reality of bringing home a new baby to your expectant mothers, talk about sex drive and or the lack there of, encourage each other to accept the process of gradual weight loss, and staying positive reminding them that just like pregnancy it does not last forever.
Let nomamipikin be left behind. We will prepare, support and help transition our new mothers. Coming to visit much later and bringing in a list of critiques for the new mom is definitely the wrong way to do it, new moms love advice but it gets overwhelming when. I am working on a "must know" list for all expectant and new mothers, lots of input from my other mamipikins will be awesome.
Kisses.